Not worthy?

Dec. 7th, 2016 09:38 pm
azurelunatic: We're about to set a weirdness baseline the likes of which the planet has never seen.  (weirdness baseline)
[personal profile] azurelunatic
Poll #17774 Proving a point to someone
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: Just the Poll Creator, participants: 1

On the worthiness of partners (this would be my primary partner, who I started seeing *formally and officially* in September)

They are worthy of dating Azz
1 (100.0%)

They are not worthy of dating Azz, sorry
0 (0.0%)

I don't know one or both of these parties well enough to answer this
0 (0.0%)

My response to this cannot be summed up in a radio button, and I should comment
0 (0.0%)

And furthermore!

They make Azz happy
1 (100.0%)

Azz makes them happy
1 (100.0%)

Their ex is a screaming toolbag
1 (100.0%)

I'm just glad nobody's in serious denial anymore
0 (0.0%)

I'm just glad nobody's cheating on anybody anymore
0 (0.0%)

What about Darkside, though?
0 (0.0%)

What about Purple, though?
0 (0.0%)

What about sithjawa, though?
0 (0.0%)

What about [attractive denizen of a certain continent], though?
0 (0.0%)

Let's hear it for polyamory
1 (100.0%)

At last, someone with a strong enough Weirdness Field to date Azz!
1 (100.0%)

At last, someone with a strong enough Weirdness Field to date this person!
1 (100.0%)

It's disconcerting the way Azz is around much less on the public internet
0 (0.0%)

Fuck cancer forever
1 (100.0%)

Nobody is allowed to marry anybody (until at least 2020)
0 (0.0%)

Why does Azz have to move to the Pacific Northwest, though?
0 (0.0%)

Teleporter!!!
1 (100.0%)

Tickybox
1 (100.0%)

Cold-Forged Flame

Dec. 7th, 2016 11:37 pm
yhlee: Avatar: The Last Airbender: "fight like a girl" (A:tLA fight like a girl)
[personal profile] yhlee
Marie Brennan's Cold-Forged Flame is one of those novellas-printed-as-a-book that are happening these days, a trend I generally approve of on the grounds that I am a slow reader and I actively seek out skinny books. In this case, however, I feel that the story would have been better served written as a full-fledged novel, or anyway a longer novella.

In Cold-Forged Flame, a woman warrior is summoned to retrieve the blood of a mysterious being called the Lhian. Complications: she has no memory of who she was. She has no choice but to carry out this quest (I read it as a geas, although it's not called that in the book). Her summoners claim that her amnesia will protect her from coming to further harm from the Lhian, and that explanations will only put her at risk. Left with no choice, she goes to confront the Lhian.

Normally amnesiac protagonists are one of my narrative kinks. What I discovered, though, is that it's not just amnesia that makes them so appealing to me. I either want angst--lots and lots and lots of angst--or I want wisecracking. There are undoubtedly examples of angsty amnesia beyond counting. As for wisecracking, the main example I can think of here is Corwin from Roger Zelazny's Nine Princes in Amber, and the Amber series had the additional advantage of such a colorful, epic setting and characters that even in the space of the first volume I found myself entranced. If your taste in amnesiac protagonists doesn't come hedged about with weird modifiers the way mine does, though, this may work better for you.

Brennan's prose is taut and vivid, and there are some interesting characters sketched here, but that's half the problem--they felt like sketches. I felt strongly that this was a consequence of the story's chosen length. I would have loved to learn more about the protagonist's nature, some of which comes clear through the course of the story, and the man she encounters and the revolution he wants to spark. But we are only given fragments, and not enough meat on the bone (if I may mix my metaphors). I am given to understand that there will be a sequel, but I would much rather have gotten a work more complete in itself.

There are some intriguing hints about the nature of myth, storytelling, and archetype, but I couldn't help but feel that Robert Holdstock's Mythago Wood did it better, if from a different direction; or perhaps, if you're willing to approach the idea from yet another angle still, Simon R. Green's Once in a Blue Moon. (Unfortunately, while I loved the Green, it's the fifth and last book in the Forest Kingdom series, with a side trip through the additional six-book Hawk and Fisher series, so it's not going to make a lick of sense without all of that as background.)

The other thing that made this book a hard sell to me was no fault of the book's, which is that I the vibe I got off the magic was partly Faerie (I think Brennan has said that some of the ideas were inspired by the White Wolf Changeling RPG) and I am a hard sell on Faerie stories with the exception of "Tam Lin." ("Tam Lin" gets grandfathered in because I imprinted as a child on Elizabeth Marie Pope's The Perilous Gard. I am so sad that the one "Tam Lin"-based novel I read this year was botched.) So if this is your sort of thing, it may well please you. But the subject material doesn't inherently interest me.

I wanted to like this more, but I don't think this was my cuppa. Perhaps another time?
gehayi: (hermione books (lilacsigil))
[personal profile] gehayi
FFT: Blurb

In which the blurb describes a great fairy tale anthology filled with active, intelligent, independent female characters...which is unfortunately the exact opposite of what we just finished reading.

Next up: the first of four bonus essays. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Total Drama Universe

Dec. 8th, 2016 12:04 am
[syndicated profile] starwarsao3allmedia_feed

Posted by <a href="/users/KrispyBaconator/pseuds/KrispyBaconator" rel="author">KrispyBaconator</a>

by

(This was my first story, so it's not bery good. Don't judge it too hard?) In order to one-up Don's new Ridonculous Race show, Chris calls in 16 unwitting competitors to travel the multiverse for a chance at one million dollars. (Inspired by Kierandell1409's Total Drama fics. I own none of the characters in this fic.)

Words: 1585, Chapters: 1/24, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of Total Drama Crossover Series by KrispyBaconator

A Secret Admirer For Christmas

Dec. 7th, 2016 11:58 pm
[syndicated profile] starwarsao3allmedia_feed

Posted by <a href="/users/sofiaibat/pseuds/OnceUponAGalaxyFarFarAway" rel="author">OnceUponAGalaxyFarFarAway (sofiaibat)</a>

by

Finn received a candy gram from a mystery admirer, and now he and Rey are going to find out who.

Words: 1498, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 7 of Stormpilot Advent Calender

A quiet but odd day, all told

Dec. 8th, 2016 01:12 am
umadoshi: (kittens - Jinksy - looking up)
[personal profile] umadoshi
PSA: 2017 sign-ups are open at [dreamwidth.org profile] inkingitout.

Today was a perfectly good, unexciting day. Nothing went particularly wrong, but nothing went as planned, either. It included things like not getting any work done (>.<), although I dealt with other things that needed doing, and my mother-in-law stopped by to give us a small applesauce cake and visit me and the cats briefly ([dreamwidth.org profile] scruloose was still at work).

In the late afternoon/early evening, Jinksy settled in for a long nap on my lap just when I'd been aiming to finally get to work, and since my deadline's a week off, I was easily persuaded. (I tweeted a few photos as he adjusted position periodically. [I took far more than I tweeted.])

Tonight I decided to finally try using a to-do app, and went with Wunderlist because a) it was already on my phone (I think I installed it on my first smartphone at someone's recommendation and never used it, but then automatically ported it over to the newer phone) and b) it has great ratings on the Google Play, although I see it has some close competition in the ratings department. So we'll see how that goes.

What I’m Reading Wednesday, 12/7

Dec. 8th, 2016 05:10 am
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
[personal profile] dira
Books:

I just finished Penric and the Shaman, so Penric’s Mission is up next! I am also “in the middle” of several things in that I have not yet accepted that I am never going to finish them so they are still in the “currently reading” category on Goodreads, but I am thinking that the New Year will probably be a good time to make a clean sweep of those.

I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that I am not going to finish the Read Harder Challenge. Maybe next year? 2017 is bound to be… not 2016, right? *knocks wood*

Books finished:

Penric and the Shaman (http://ift.tt/2h8fXVF) by Lois McMaster Bujold

This is the second in the series, after Penric’s Demon, and, oh man. <3 <3 <3 There are THE BEST DOGS and also I burst into tears at the climax and also an excellent line about the Son of Autumn and who belongs to him. <3 <3 <3

Ice Planet Barbarians (http://ift.tt/2d3me07) & 

Barbarian Alien (http://ift.tt/2h8hr1P) by Ruby Dixon

I KNOW I KNOW BUT THEY’RE ACTUALLY KINDA… GOOD? AWESOME??

These are the first two of 11 or so books, following the fate of a dozen young women abducted by aliens from all over the US (and one from Canada) and whisked off to space to be… sold, probably. Six of them are put in cryostasis by the aliens, but several more are packed into a cage in a cargo hold, aware of their fate and abused by their guards. In Book 1, Ice Planet Barbarians, our heroine is Georgie, who takes the lead on a plan to fight back, which… kind of succeeds, in that Georgie bludgeons an alien guard to death. Unfortunately, they can’t go on to take over the ship because they’ve been jettisoned from it, abandoned on a harsh ice planet in the jammies they were wearing when the aliens abducted them from their beds. 

And that, obviously, is when Georgie strikes out to scout for food/shelter/help and meets a seven-foot tall blue alien dude who realizes instantly that she is his perfect match for making babies with! :D :D :D 

(No seriously though they’re ACTUALLY GOOD? AND KINDA ADDICTIVE?? TW for rape & multiple deaths in the first book though.)

Fics:

I have ten fic tabs open, including “The True Repairman Will Repair Man” (http://ift.tt/2bx2oJI) which is on part 16/? and needs a reread, as the Plot Is Thickening. :D

Fics finished:

(A sampling of stuff I’ve bookmarked recently–you can see all my bookmarks at http://ift.tt/2bFC4A9)

Something Like This by @emmagrant01 (http://ift.tt/1oHy0BG) Check, Please! Jack/Bitty, Parse/OMC. Complete, as of today, at 280k. <3________<3 If you need a huge long immersive Jack-and-Bitty-getting-together story, complete with Parse also finding true love along the way, HERE IT IS. AU before Jack and Bitty got together in canon, and featuring a demisexual Jack, which was catnip to me. Gorgeous. 

Weary World Rejoicing by @annakovsky (http://ift.tt/2gd0a3f) Buffy the Vampire Slayer, post-”The Gift” apocalypse AU. This fic is just about 13 years old, but I think of it every time I hear “O Holy Night” and this year I actually went and reread it. Oh, everyone. (Then I read the sequel for, I think, the very first time, and OH EVERYONE ;______; and also I spent many confused minutes afterward pawing through the Wikipedia article on the Fisher King, hoping to make things make sense. Which, ha ha, why would a grail legend make sense of anything ever.)

from Tumblr http://ift.tt/2h8qyzB
via IFTTT

Fresh Wounds

Dec. 7th, 2016 11:44 pm
[syndicated profile] starwarsao3allmedia_feed

Posted by <a href="/users/transylvelvet/pseuds/transylvelvet" rel="author">transylvelvet</a>

by

"Clearly, Kylo was not the only one whose pride was wounded by the Resistance rebels that day." Wherein, roles are reversed and Kylo makes an important discovery about the Force.

Words: 1938, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Squids!

Dec. 8th, 2016 03:56 pm
st_aurafina: Harold Finch's face (POI: Harold)
[personal profile] st_aurafina
Insta Rec
I wrote a Supergirl fic of necessary hugs: Lights Will Guide You Home (Kara Danvers/Daisy Johnson, General) and guess what, [personal profile] monanotlisa wrote a beautiful and adorable coda for it: Hide Away in Daylight (Kara Danvers/Daisy Johnson, General) Everything is squishy hugs and nothing hurts.


The State of Me
Oh, man, I don't know if it's the prednisolone taper, but I'm so woozy and full of fogs. It might be that my GI tract got so inflamed that I couldn't absord oral meds, so now I'm basically re-establishing my Pristiq and other meds all at once? I'm foggy and I have a concentration window of about two minutes, and my balance is kind of fucked. Not very me at all. To be fair, my suffering is not great. But I feel like a balloon animal. Maybe a dachshund. Maybe a giraffe?

Oh, but [personal profile] lilacsigil has just come back from the street to tell me that the cafe that makes the great salt and pepper squid has it on their specials board today, so I am getting squiddy with my lunch. I have such fish cravings since I've been sick. Fish and nuts. All the oils. Get in my body, oils. And squids.


NaNo Round-up
I'm picking through the scattered debris of my NaNo adventure to see what actually happened in that weird month.

- Finished the POI Five Things fic, though one of the parts is decidedly odd with only some good bits. The good bits might sprout something better, though, so I shall see. Total word count: 31,767.
- Finished the POI Sentinel/Guide fic, though I think it needs some fleshing out in parts. I quite like this one, actually? It's iddy as all get out and has lots of hugging and touching and bonding. I think, once I've got my Yuletide sorted, I'll work on this one. Total word count: 16,229
- Wrote one chapter of the Bucky fic. It was a weird but necessary chapter. 7266 words, taking that fic to a total of 62,044, holy shit.
- The Supergirl fic of necessary hugs, which I've already posted. (2032 words)
- The POI fixit fic is where it got weird and throw-words-at-the-wall-ish. I'm a little scared to look. I had a fever. 13,828 words, some of which may not be consecutive or legible.
- Last minute desperation words, Harold Finch competence porn. 2602 words. I want to finish this, because it's fun, and because I like exploring Harold's hidden skillsets.


Activist Links
From [personal profile] china_shop:
Here’s What I’m Telling My Brown Son About Trump’s America
A sad but also hopeful essay, and this got me:
But listen, love, because I need to remind you of something and I need you to remember it extra well over the next four years: This is our street. It is our street. So when you feel that rumbling pushing up through your palms, I want you to press them flat against it, and do not be afraid to hear everything.

From [community profile] thisfinecrew:
Boycott These Companies: boycotting companies that support Trump

From [personal profile] newredshoes:
Speak Up & Stay Safe(r): A Guide to Protecting Yourself From Online Harassment


Self-care and soothing
- This twitter thread about a comicbook store helper and a tiny new Supergirl baby gay made me cry with happiness and wish there'd been this kind of visibility for me in the eighties. It's so important. (Please don't kill Maggie, please don't kill Alex, please.)

- From Buzzfeed, Ocean's Eight is looking like the best movie thing that's ever happened omg: Based On Set Photos It Looks Like “Ocean’s Eight” Will Be The Greatest Movie In The History Of Movies

- Journaling Practice - Peony and Parakeet is a art-journalling blog I'm fond of, and she posted about being an introvert and an artist, which is something that I clicked with. Her blog is a good, thoughtful, mindful kind of place for art stuff.

- From [personal profile] umadoshi, (Almost) Every SFF Adaptation Coming to Television and Movie Theaters!
This is a weird and amazing list of things. And oh, wow that Camelot procedural series. It will surely be terrible and I will watch the crap out of it.

- Chocolate Box is running again this year! Schedule at [community profile] chocolateboxcomm.

- [community profile] fandom_stocking too, has sign-ups going: Sign-up Post


Squid ETA: It was delicious but a Pharmacy Board inspector showed up, which seems like an odd coincidence. Will investigate further tomorrow.

Misc. linkspam (19 links)

Dec. 8th, 2016 12:54 am
umadoshi: (Tutu/ItW "charm for a prince" (bookelfe))
[personal profile] umadoshi
"Bright threads in the tapestry: on the 2016 Tiptree Fellowship". [[twitter.com profile] likhain (Mia Sereno)'s post on being awarded the Tiptree Fellowship]

"Google, democracy and the truth about internet search". [The Guardian] This is rather terrifying.

"Touching Photos Show Protesters Celebrating After Dakota Access Pipeline Victory". [Buzzfeed]

"Forget Coffins! This Company Will Swirl You Into Beautiful Glass Creations When You Die".

"It's not your grandma's Book of the Month Club". (*side-eyes the headline writer*)

"Can You Figure Out the Mystery Inside This Remarkable Ad About High School Love?" (Speaking of headline styles that should be retired. And possibly incinerated first.)

"We went to Victoria's Secret and saw why it's a disgrace to ALL women".

From the same blog, and linked from the above article, "I tried the bras that Kate Middleton wears — and here's why I'm hooked". Fun read with what sounds to my (BEYOND AMATEUR ear) like solid bra-fitting advice, plus a truly remarkable bit of info for wearing white shirts.

"This artist reimagined Disney princesses as badass tattoo queens".

"Christmas Ghost Stories: A Spooky Festive Tradition". (Includes many links.)

"Around the World in Eighty Cokes: Touring the World of Coca-Cola". [Lucky Peach]

"A visual compendium of glowing creatures". [2014]

"In the Deep, Clues to How Life Makes Light".

"Our Fairy Tales Ourselves: Storytelling From East to West: Marie Mutsuki Mockett on What a Story Can Be". [LitHub, January 2016]

"How the largest mass-blinding in Canadian history birthed CNIB: The Halifax Explosion taught Canada important lessons on living with blindness". [CBC]

"The Bay Is Now Selling The Most Badass 3 Piece Christmas Suits For $129".

"Celebrity 'READ' Posters Of The 80s and 90s". [Book Riot]

"16 Floor-to-Ceiling Bookshelves That Will Make Your Jaw Drop". [slideshow]

"History of 'Happy Holidays'".

Yuletide

Dec. 7th, 2016 11:38 pm
settiai: (Yuletide -- liviapenn)
[personal profile] settiai
I would like to state, for the record, that I feel so sorry for the Yuletide mods right now. All of them. Every single one.

That said? If all of the assignments had to be accidentally purged, at least it happened now instead of at an even worse time closer to the deadline(s).

(But, oh gods, I can't even imagine.)
primsong: (two clever)
[personal profile] primsong
AAAAAAaaaaa!  My library got the dvd of Enemy of the World - I've just seen it all the way through (twice!) and it's...

;lsakejfd;lsjf;lsajflsjfdalkjf;ls!   !!!  !   :-D   Yippie!  Woo! Jamie is made of awesome!  Two is made of Extreme Awesomesauce even as a bad guy!  Waaaawoooo yip yip!  Victoria is adorbs!  Yoicks! Wooooo!

Or something like that.

I want to purchase a copy now, this is just lovely stuff.  We expect an ice storm tomorrow, so I may just curl up with it for one more go before I have to give it back.

Pew pew pew

Dec. 7th, 2016 10:17 pm
apollymi: Faraday staring off, no text (Mag7**Faraday: Middle distance)
[personal profile] apollymi
[personal profile] katsuko and I are rewatching Guardians of the Galaxy. It's at least in part because I'm reading Guardians fic and in part because I need some Chris Pratt in my life right now. It's still a few more days until The Magnificent Seven BluRay arrives, after all.

I've been working on setting up something of a story bible for the new verse I'm working on with [personal profile] katsuko, Monstrous. It's still very early in the setup, but it'll be here.
[syndicated profile] notalwaysright_feed

Posted by BD

Boat Repair | Columbia, SC, USA

(I answer phones at a boat repair shop. We live in an area where bass fishing is BIG business and have a mobile repair truck that we dispatch to docks and people’s backyards.)

Me: “Good morning. Thank you for calling—”

Caller #1: *interrupts me* “Oh, thank god you are there. I really need your need help!”

(The caller sounds like a teenager.)

Me: “Okay, how can I help—”

Caller #1: “I really need you to get out here and fix a [type & size of] motor. TODAY!”

Me: “We are booked up right now. We won’t have time to come see it until next week.”

Caller #1: “NO, NO, PLEASE! You have to come TODAY! My dad is going to kill me!”

Me: “Okay, calm down. I can send someone out but it will be a $100 charge to even come see it.”

Caller #1: “$100! I don’t have that kind of money! I… I…”

Me: *in a motherly tone* “Hon, how old are you?”

Caller #1: “I’m sixteen.”

Me: “What happened?”

Caller #1: “My dad went out of town for the weekend. He told me not to touch his boat but I had some friends over and—”

Me: “…and you wanted to show off and you did something?”

Caller #1: “Yeah.”

Me: “Okay, what did you do; maybe I can help you?”

Caller #1: “Well, we were in the backyard and I got up on the boat and started it and it ran great for a few minutes and then when I tried to rev it, it made a clunk sound, smoke poured out, and now it won’t start.”

Me: “Wait, you ran it on a trailer in the backyard? It wasn’t in water?”

Caller #1: “Yeah. What do I do? My dad is going to be furious.”

Me: “You need to call an adult relative and get them to come over with you.”

Caller #1: “Why?”

Me: “Because you are dead meat. Your father is going to kill you. You blew the motor.”

Caller #1: “What?! Can’t you fix it?”

Me: “NO. You overheated it. The reason boats need to be in the water is because it sucks in water to use to cool the engine. You ran it OUT of water so there was nothing to cool the engine. You overheated it and blew it.”

Caller #1: “But you can fix it, right?”

Me: “No, you will have to buy a new motor.”

Caller #1: “How much? I have a bank account.”

Me: “The motor you described will cost $6,000.”

(At this point he starts crying and begging me to help him and fix the motor. I tell him I am sorry; there is nothing to be done except call a relative and be a man and tell his father the truth, and next time listen to his father. Two days later I get a call:)

Me: “Good morning; how may I help you?”

Caller #2: “Yeah, my dumb-a** son ran my boat in the yard, and overheated and blew the motor. I need to know the cost of a new motor so I can let him know how long he is going to have to work to pay it off.”

(I was glad to hear the kid would live.)

The post We’re Gonna Need A Bigger Boat Insurance appeared first on Funny & Stupid Customer Stories - Not Always Right.

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YOU NEED A BOOK

A POEM EVERY DAY

The collected poems from my descent into madness year spent writing daily poems are now available from Lulu as the cheapest 330-page book they would let me make ($16.20). If that's too pricey, you can also get it from Lulu as a free download, or just click on the "a poem every day" tag to read them here. But if you did buy one, that'd be awesome.

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