W00t!

Jul. 26th, 2017 05:07 pm
stonebender: (Default)
[personal profile] stonebender
Guess what? They did it! This time my second dose of Spinraza is swirling around in my spinal column. It was still pretty difficult this time although they did make some adjustments. I got a CT scan in addition to fluoroscope. I guess the CT gave them a little more information. Apparently I have a lot of bone in the way of some natural access points. The one place they’ve managed to be successful is a fairly small hole and they’ve got to approach it at just the right angle. They worked on me for about an hour. Having gone through this the day before, Tuesday’s hour was about my limit.

Another adjustment they made, was not putting me on the table until the doctors were ready to proceed. I still had to wait while they checked my spine out with the fluoroscope, but at least all the time I was on the table they were working towards the injection. I’m going to have a long conversation with the doctors in the near future. There must be some way they can make this process easier. I’m not so worried about getting my “loading” doses but I am concerned about the continuing process of getting these shots. I have a third dose in two weeks and then a fourth dose a month after that. Then I need to get a dose every four months for the rest of my life. I guess I will deal if I have to but it’s a discouraging prospect.

I’m going to try to respond to everyone individually, but if I don’t get to you, please know that all of your support with the support of my family makes it possible for me to go through this. I think I’ve noticed some improvements in my physical status, but I hesitate to talk about it much this early in the process. I will keep people informed.
fightingarrival: (Default)
[personal profile] fightingarrival
Hey, kids! It’s almost time to talk about Grant Morrison.

Or, at least some Grant Morrison. We still have Batman Incorporated, Arkham Asylum, Batman: Gothic, and his JLA run to get to, but we’re going to start off with the big story - his critically acclaimed mega-meta-bat-opus that took from 2006 through 2011 and one company wide event to tell.

But before that post gets written: a rant.

COMICS ACQUISITION )
musesfool: Reboot Uhura (never tell me the odds)
[personal profile] musesfool
So on Monday the realtor I've been working with sent me 10 listings to choose from and I said I liked five, and so I'm seeing 2 out of those five tomorrow evening (the two most expensive and also the two I was least interested in. funny how that works out. the one that was my fave accepted an offer yesterday and is thus off the market now. Sigh. eta: and there goes my second fave, with an accepted offer. but I'm seeing the last one on Saturday, so there's hope! I like each of these three, just not as much as I liked the other two and also they each have one drawback or another, I guess./eta). I'm trying to keep an open mind, but I'd really like to see the two I like more before I have to make any decisions.

How can it only be Wednesday? Yesterday felt like it was 8 days long in and of itself. Sigh.

What I've just finished
Nothing.

What I'm reading now
Still on Abaddon's Gate. I like it but not as much as the first two books so it's taking me longer to read (the fact that I haven't been getting a seat on the train hasn't helped). I feel like the new characters are not nearly as interesting as Avasarala and Bobbie, though I like Anna and Bull just fine. Melba, otoh... On the plus side, spoilers ) I'm about a hundred pages from the end so I'm guessing there's still some excitement to come.

What I'm reading next
Regardless, I did pick up the next book - Cibola Burn - because I do want to see what happens next. I just also wish we got the POV from the others on the Roci instead of all Holden all the time there.

***
selenak: (BambergerReiter by Ningloreth)
[personal profile] selenak
Having now read three of the four books the first two seasons of The Last Kingdom are based on, I find my original suspicion that Bernard Cornwell novels benefit from adaptions into other media because these take you out of the main character's head justified, though not always quite in the way I assumed. Because the novels are narrated by an older Uthred looking back, his narrating self can sometimes point out things his younger self did not yet see or realise, for example, that he wronged his first wife Mildrith, or that he underestimated Alfred early on because a chronically sick non-warrior valueing learning and feeling guilty about sex could not possibly be a strong leader in his young eyes. Otoh, older, wiser Uthred narrating still doesn't change the fact most female characters come across as more dimensional and fleshed out in the tv adaption than they do in the novels (Brida and Mildrith in the first, Hild and Aelswith in the second season - Iseult, alas, is a cliché in both versions).

The tv show cut or compressed various characters and slimmed down events, and given that they do two books per season so far, that's not surprising. But even if they took a longer time, I think some of the changes and cuts were to the narrative's benefit. For example: Cornwell has to come up with some pretty convoluted circumstances and far-stretched plots to have a teenage Uthred who is still with the Danes secretly present when Prince (not yet King) Alfred confesses about his carnal lapses to Beocca. In the book, he needs to be because he's the narrator and neither Alfred nor Beocca would have told him about this. The tv show dispenses with said circumstances and just has the scene between Alfred and Beocca, without Uthred secretly listening in, because he doesn't need to be in order for the audience to get this information about the young Alfred.

Mind you, dispensing with the first two times Uthred meets Alfred and letting their first encounter not happen until after Ragnar the Elder's death creates one important difference between book and show relationship that's worth mentioning. Book Uthred lies to Alfred (and Beocca) these first two times and point blank spies on them for the Danes, so the later "why do you keep distrusting me?" indignation rings a little hollow in this regard. Show Uthred does no such thing, so Alfred is accordingly less justified in his lingering ambiguity.

Another cut that somewhat shifts perception: the first novel has Uthred participating in a few Danish raids led by Ragnar, including one on Aelswith's hometown (though she doesn't know he took part). Now, in the show we go from Uthred the child to adult Uthred directly and adult Uthred is solely seen at Ragnar's home, with the deaths of Ragnar & Co. impending, but given adult Uthred later is shown to be already a skilled fighter, it stands to reason he practiced these skills. But I suspect the show avoided showing Uthred fighting against Saxon civilians this early on deliberately. Both show and books have Uthred loving the Danes but staying with the Saxons post Ragnar's death because various circumstances (and then Alfred's machinations) make it impossible for him to do otherwise. Only the book, though, spells out that Uthred doesn't start to feel any kind of identification/emotional connection to the Saxons until he sees them winning a battle (until then, narrator Uthred says, he hadn't thought Danes could lose, which makes sense given that throughout Uthred's childhood and adolescence, they were winning), when before he regarded them as weak and didn't want to think of himself as belonging to them. Which makes sense given Uthred is raised in a warrior culture and is a young, arrogant adolescent at the time, but again, I suspect the tv version avoids spelling this out in order not to make him off putting early on when establishing the character.

Otoh, the scenes the tv show adds in the two seasons where Uthred isn't present all serve to flesh out the characters in question more and work to their benefit, whether it's Alfred, Hild, Aelswith or Beocca. The notable exception is Guthred in s2, whose additional scenes make him look worse, not better than the novel does. Possibly, too, because in the novel Guthred is described having an easy charm that makes Book!Uthred forgive him even the truly terrible thing Guthred does to Uthred, and the actor playing Guthred on the show doesn't have that at all, and instead comes across as nothing but fearful, easily influenced and weak. (And show!Uthred while coming to terms with him doesn't forgive him.) I have to say, lack of actorly charm aside, given that Guthred does something spoilery to Uthred ), I find the tv version more realistic.

The push-pull relationship between Uthred and Alfred is there in both versions, but in the tv show, it comes across as more central. As my local library has it, I also read "Death of Kings", the novel in which, Alfred dies, not without manipulating Uthred one last time into doing what he wants him to do, and Uthred's thoughts on the man later, summing him up, are Cornwell's prose at its best:

I stood beside Alfred's coffin and thought how life slipped by, and how, for nearly all my life, Alfred had been there like a great landmark. I had not liked him. I had struggled against him, despised him and admired him. I hated his religion and its cold disapproving gaze, its malevolence that cloaked itself in pretended kindness, and its allegiance to a god who would drain the joy from the world by naming it sin, but Alfred's religion had made him a good man and a good king.
And Alfred's joyless soul had proved a rock against which the Danes had broken themselves. Time and again they had attacked, and time and again Alfred had out-thought them, and Wessex grew ever stronger and richer and all that was because of Alfred. We think of kings as privileged men who rule over us and have the freedom to make, break and flaunt the law, but Alfred was never above the law he loved to make. He saw his life as a duty to his god and to the people of Wessex and I have never seen a better king, and I doubt my sons, grandson and their children's children will ever see a better one. I never liked him, but I have never stopped admiring him. He was my king and all that I now have I owe to him. The food that I eat, the hall where I live and the swords of my men, all started with Alfred, who hated me at times, loved me at times, and was generous with me. He was a gold-giver.


Last Yuletide I added a Last Kingdom request at the last minute because I'd seen it had been nominated, and accordingly it was short, but this Yuletide I think I'll also offer, and will request in more detail and more characters. While the other historical tv shows I consumed during the last year were entertaining in various degrees, this was the only one which was also good.
kaylarudbek: Justice seated in the heavens with open eyes and an uplifted sword (Default)
[personal profile] kaylarudbek
So at one point in my life I lived in Madison, Wisconsin and I bought some jumpers while I was there. They look like a button-up sleeveless dress (princess-seamed) with a wide/draped skirt, but the skirt is split so that it's possible to safely and comfortably ride a bicycle. Years have passed, I've gained weight and I'd need a minimizing bra to fit into the top of these dresses. Now I've got a sewing machine and I'd like to find a pattern to duplicate the style of the jumpers, and I'm turning up flat nothing with Google. Anybody ever seen something like this, or am I going to have to get some tracing paper and use the old dresses as templates for a newer one?
stonebender: (Default)
[personal profile] stonebender
Today was supposed to be the day for my second dose of Spinraza. I showed up half an hour early to my appointment at the Stanford Neurological Clinic. Checked in and was sent to radiology. They told me that the second time should be easier. They had done the procedure successfully once. Documented where they had been successful and things were supposed to go more smoothly this time. Well I'm home and it's 9 o'clock-ish and I did not get the Spinraza today. The nurse, Connie tells me we can try again tomorrow, but if we are unsuccessful, I don't think I will be getting anymore medication.

Like last time, I was transferred from my wheelchair to a gurney. I had to wait a couple of hours because there was another person getting Spinraza ahead of me. I guess they're getting a lot more interest from people with SMA.

Around 11 o'clock they wheeled me into the room and transferred me to the cold hard table they use. They positioning me on my left side again and then I waited 10 or 15 minutes for the doctor to show up. Normally this isn’t a big issue I’m used to being patient and waiting for doctors, but laying on a flat surface is painful for me. My diagnosis causes contractures in my joints especially my hips and knees. So I don’t really do flat surfaces very well and making the surface hard doesn’t improve the situation.

Eventually the doctor showed and they finished positioning me and started taking pictures to decide the best site for the lumbar puncture. After 30 minutes or so they numbed me up and started poking. Now I want to be clear the staff at Stanford are really great to me. They were very thorough and professional this time. I just apparently have a uniquely fucked up spinal column. Even though they saw what looked like a very promising site for the puncture they kept hitting bone. Around an hour and 30 minutes I was starting to get in real pain. I had been in pain since they put me on the hard table and I was able to manage it but at this point I was starting to feel like couldn’t really take much more. I was even neglecting to report some pain from the puncture because it just didn’t really hurt as much as the rest of my body.

My shoulders ached, my hips hurt and the ribs on my left side were killing me. The doctors kept asking me to hang in there and Connie asked to give them five more minutes. They pulled out the needle, changed doctors and took another try at a whole new area of my spine. (After having made two attempts higher up on my back.) After another 30 minutes the doctor said she was very. very close and to hang in there. I tried for another 10 or 15 minutes and reluctantly pled uncle.

I was in agony. I was sweating. I was exhausted. Frustrated with myself and the universe for screwing around again. They rolled me on my back and eventually got me into my wheelchair. My worker, who came with me, had an appointment for her doctor at 2:30 in the afternoon. We hadn’t thought we would be at Stanford this long, but once I was done we rushed to the car and tried to get to Highland as soon as possible. We did manage to get her to the hospital about five minutes late and she texted us later to tell us the doctor saw her. So at least I didn’t screw her day up.

Connie said she would try to work something out. You see this drug has to be administered on a strict schedule once I had my first dose two weeks ago I have to have the next two doses in intervals of two weeks. However it turns out that I have one day leeway. I must get my next dose tomorrow or I think I need to start over again. I’m not at all sure I would get the approvals. I am the first person with Medi-Cal and Medicare who has been approved for the treatment. I was supposed to be the test subject. Connie said she'd call me later and she did. I have an appointment to try again tomorrow.

The problem is tomorrow I was supposed to have my caseworker do their annual review for my IHSS (which funds my personal care workers). I have never had to reschedule before but I had to reschedule in order to go to my original appointment. We rescheduled for the following day which of course now I can’t make. So I need to cancel again and hope they won’t be too upset.

I feel like I failed. I know intellectually I didn’t, but I think of myself as being pretty stubborn and I’m proud of that. Now, I gave up and I can’t help thinking I should’ve tried to hang in there a little longer. I really hope these treatments get easier or I don’t know how much of it I can take. Wish me luck tomorrow. And hope my caseworker doesn’t decide to screw me over.
musesfool: Carol Danvers as Captain Marvel (not alone in the dark)
[personal profile] musesfool
I cried my way through Gifted on Saturday, and I can only hope CEvans decides to do a sideline in loving dad roles going forward because it's a good look for him. Needed more Octavia Spencer, though.

And yesterday, I watched Orphan Black: Gag and Throttle
spoilers )

In SDCC news:

+ the Black Panther stuff all looks AMAZING
+ Thor: Ragnarok looks delightfully charming
+ Infinity War looks like a hot mess but features beardy Steve in a black stealth suit and Bucky with a new arm, so I'll get over Natasha's blonde hair, I guess. The ability of any movie to service so many characters, otoh...
+ Justice League looks like two separate movies being smooshed into one - I am into Wonder Woman and Aquaman, as well as Alfred and Jim Gordon, but skeptical of everything else. is this a spoiler? )
+ The Star Wars books in the lead up to The Last Jedi look like fun (CHEWIE AND THE PORGS! Legends of Luke Skywalker! A 16yo Princess Leia book! A Canterbury Tales-like anthology! With authors like Ken Liu and Elizabeth Wein and Saladin Ahmed in addition to Claudia Gray and Chuck Wendig!) I am excite!
+ I like that Captain Marvel is going to be set in the 90s - it explains why they cast someone so young as Carol, though I wonder if that means they'll recast for present-day Carol or what. And Nick Fury will be there! And maybe we could get a Peggy Carter cameo!

I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting atm, but work keeps interrupting. Sigh.

***

Orphan Black 5.07.

Jul. 24th, 2017 02:22 pm
selenak: (Rachel by Naginis)
[personal profile] selenak
In which there's pay off for severa storylines, hooray! And flashbacks.

Who are you? )
musesfool: Nick/Cassie, Push (ours is a forbidden love)
[personal profile] musesfool
For [personal profile] grammarwoman for the DVD commentary meme.

Driving with the brakes on
Push (2009); Nick/Cassie (Nick/OFC); adult; 13,650 words
Nick discovers a way to help Cassie see more clearly. It's a little sketchier than he's comfortable with.

I don't actually remember the genesis of this idea, but there's a post in my LJ that says, So I said to [personal profile] angelgazing, "Tell me not to write the story where orgasms make Cassie's visions clearer" and she said, "you should TOTALLY write that story" and two weeks and 13k words later, I wrote the story. Which is basically how these things go when [tumblr.com profile] angelgazing wants me to write a thing, especially if I already kind of want to write it anyway.

content notes: Cassie's 16; one reference to offscreen sexual assault of non-canon characters

All through the writing of this story, Cassie was 15. Cassie was 15 right up until I actually posted. Then I had a conversation with [personal profile] snacky and decided to make her 16 instead. I don't think it makes it better? But maybe some people are slightly less squicked? Idk.

But unless the moon falls tonight, unless continents collide, / Nothing's gonna make me break from her side )

~*~

I hope that provided some insight on what was a 13K word exercise in id-fic. *hands*

~*~
rydra_wong: Doonesbury, Watergate, two congressmen: "If only he'd knock over a bank or something ..." "By George, we'd have him them!" (bank -- watergate)
[personal profile] rydra_wong
So Sean Spicer's resigned (we all knew it was coming), Sessions discussed the Trump campaign and policy issues with Kisylak in 2016, and Trump looks like he's revving up to fire Mueller and Sessions and then pardon himself and his family for everything they've done ever.

And all I can focus on is this story that Sean Spicer stole a mini-fridge from junior White House staffers.

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hradzka: Cassidy, from Garth Ennis's PREACHER. (Default)
hradzka

November 2014

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YOU NEED A BOOK

A POEM EVERY DAY

The collected poems from my descent into madness year spent writing daily poems are now available from Lulu as the cheapest 330-page book they would let me make ($16.20). If that's too pricey, you can also get it from Lulu as a free download, or just click on the "a poem every day" tag to read them here. But if you did buy one, that'd be awesome.

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